Those who witnessed Bigfoot in our commercial featuring our very own Ronnie Lamarque can breathe a sigh of relief- the monster would never live in New Orleans. The humid and hot climate that one can only grow to tolerate would be way too difficult for the beast to bare, as its fur coating would certainly make it prone to heat exhaustion. In fact, Bigfoot would likely only be found in the Pacific Northwest region (Washington and Oregon for example) and in mountainous areas that provide caves as shelters. Bigfoot would also never survive the water boil advisories in New Orleans, because it dehydrates rather easily. You can now enjoy sleeping with both of your eyes closed.
MOST ORDINARY MAN: Mardi Gras Royalty
Ford Gains Ground In Europe
Auto sales are making a comeback in Europe. This past August, the industry
reported sales growth at 10.9% relative to past monthly numbers, and 8.9% growth
since the beginning of the year.
Even with the auto industy’s market size expanding, Ford’s bringing in the biggest
piece of that pie.
As demand in Europe increases for larger and commercial vehicles, Ford is cashing
in, and actively taking market share. Ford has gained an additional 2.3% share of
commercial vehicles in August (to 14.3%) and an additional 1.7% share of
commercial vehicles to date (to 12.5%). Ford has outperformed the auto industry in
terms of its own sales growth as well, as the company experienced 11.7% relative
growth in the month of August and 10% this year thus far.
Ford is now the second most popular car brand in Europe behind Volkswagen.
MOST ORDINARY MAN: Doing Ordinary Things
MOST ORDINARY MAN: Lamarques His Territory
Lamarque Ford proudly presents,
The Most Ordinary Man in New Orleans.
DID YOU KNOW? The State of Louisiana is shaped like an “L” because Ronnie Lamarques his territory, Big Foot hired paparazzi just to prove HE exists, AND he has an entire chapter in the Book of World Records?? MOST ORDINARY MAN in NOLA. #MostOrdinaryMan
MOST ORDINARY MAN: Messing With History
Lamarque Ford proudly presents,
THE MOST ORDINARY MAN IN NEW ORLEANS.
The Most Ordinary Man in NOLA sets the record straight. This is what they left out of textbooks. These are the facts. Napoleon Bonaparte’s credit was a joke and Ronnie Lamarque is the whole reason the Louisiana purchase happened… with 0% APR, no less! Enjoy! #MostOrdinaryMan
Just Truckin Around
Is your ride a coupe or sedan? Is your view constantly obstructed by a truck, making traffic the most oppressive nightmare of all time?
Well like the bumper sticker says, “If You Can’t Beat Um, JOIN UM.”
Not only are trucks the perfect weapon against the pothole tyranny that has befallen the New-Metro area, driving a truck is like the South’s secret handshake. It’s like, “Who’s this joker? Wait is that an F-150? I thought that was you, how’ve you been brother?!”
Not convinced?
Well perhaps try these scenarios on for size, after which we DEFY YOU to not jump into your lame 4-door and fly to Lamarque Ford for a Truck-grade.
(See what we did there? It’s like upgrade, but with “Truck.” This is both a dealership and a comedy club.)
These are luxury vehicles plus your list of assets now includes “built-in pool.” Your stock just went up.
#MarriageMaterial
Because self respect. Get off the ground.
“Let’s go Tramping,” is suddenly a great idea.
#TrampStamp #RonnieLamarqueBumperSticker
SIDE NOTE: Business in the Front, Party in the Back is exactly right.
#MulletOnWheels
When ya gotta GO on the go. Porta-Potties just got extra portable.
Here in New Orleans its more like Parade-a-Potty.
#MardiGrasLife
Always travel with a back-up plan.
This is America and we have options.
Also, hella HORSE POWER.
#Merica
We call that the “pickup” feature. You’re Welcome.
CAR WARS: The Internet Strikes Back
The future is here!! Well… almost. The race is on to develop the first commercially-available autonomous car. Cruise control? More like LOSE CONTROL!
Who, you might ask, is in the race to launch this person-free driving machine? Ford? Chrysler? GM? Surprisingly, NONE of the the “Big Three” manufacturers have decided to join the competition, and have decided to leave this new technology to Silicon Valley. As of now, Google and Apple are leading the charge to take the wheel away from us all.
REVENGE OF THE COMPUTER NERDS has descended upon the Auto Universe, taking the designs, functionality and features to another dimension.
Supposing ALL of Silicon Valley get’s in the race, how would their respective cars perform?
Google
-A car that, much like Google Chrome, crashes immediately upon starting up.
-They call it “Google Plus Car,” which everyone uses it for a week and then immediately go back to driving their Ford.
-It keeps mistakenly driving you to strip clubs and adult novelty stores.
Facebook
-You don’t have to steer the car, but you have to “like” and “share” everything that it does in order to keep it going.
-Every time you get in, one of your annoying relatives is already in your back seat and wants to show you some dumb meme that you already hated a month ago.
-Every time you pass another car it asks you, “do you recognize this person?”
Twitter
-Get’s you there in 140 seconds, while the facebook car takes a month to get to the same point.
-If you ever state an opinion while driving it, every other car on the road immediately tries to run you over and kill you.
Microsoft
-It takes 30 minutes to start up if you didn’t clean its Windows after it’s last drive.
-Pulls over to the side of the road every 5 minutes until you update your Anti-Virus software
Apple
-Cost twice as much as the Microsoft car and only hipsters and college kids want to drive it.
-Drives great for a while, then freezes, starts to spin, and dies.
Tinder
-Keeps veering off the road to either the left or the right.
-Pretty sure all of the places that it’s going to take you to don’t look anything like their pictures.
Instagram
-Car only comes in “Valencia,” “X Pro II,” “Mayfair” and “Lo-Fi.”
-Only aspiring models, compulsive over-eaters (food pornography is an addiction) and anyone who has ever walked around outside, are the only people who get financing. The more unemployed, the better.
Craigslist
-Trying to buy the car, but instead you just wire some money to a Nigerian prince.
Tumblr
-Just a car full of teenagers that don’t know what they are doing.
Ford Rangers “Now Playing” in Nigeria
Ford Motor Company has just made known to the public their plans to release the Ford Ranger to Nigerian markets. Outside of South Africa, It is actually the first country to produce Ford vehicles on the continent The assembly plant in Ikeja, Nigeria is set to create 180 new jobs, while also having the ability to produce 5,000 units a year.
FORD on the Brain: POP QUIZ!
Ford Motor Company
What do you know about the Ford Motor Company?
Take this quick A.E. Motors Ultimate Cars Challenge.
“Check Your Answers” at the end of the quiz.
1. Based in Dearborn, Michigan, a suburb of Detroit, the automaker was founded by Henry Ford.
WHAT year was it founded?Cars Trivia from Alan’s Fun Trivia Quizzes
June 16, 1903
June 16, 1913
June 16, 1923
2. Ford was launched in a converted factory in 1903 with $28,000 in cash from twelve investors.
WHO were notable investors?
John and Horace Dodge
John Chrysler
William Olds
3. WHAT was the car name in 1903?
Model A
Model K
Model S
4. WHEN was the Model T introduced?
1905
1906
1908
5. By 1919, WHAT was the percentage of cars sold in the United States made by Ford?
25%
50%
75%
6., WHO succeeded Henry Ford as president of the company, although Henry still kept a hand in management in 1919?
Edsel Ford
Hiram Johnson
Ben Malone
7. In 1927, WHAT model replaced the Model T?
Model R
Model V
Model A
8. WHEN did Ford expanded its reach into the luxury auto market through its acquisition of the Lincoln Motor Company, named for Abraham Lincoln whom Henry Ford admired?
February 4, 1922
February 4, 1932
February 4, 1942
9. After Bantam invented the Jeep, the War Department handed production over to Ford.
True or False?
10. WHAT was the aircraft Ford built at their Willow Run plant during World War Two?
P-51 Mustang
P-38 Lighting
B-24 Liberator
Ford Motor Company
[Answers]
1) A. 2) A. 3) A. 4) C. 5) B. 6) A. 7) C. (redesigned) 8) A. 9) True 10) C.